Ghia’s New Chocolate-Hazelnut Spread Is… Horny?
The brand made a name for itself with N/A drinks — now, it’s entering the libido-booster game with a Nutella-esque ‘Happy Ending’ spread
I never asked for my Nutella to make me horny. The latest chocolate hazelnut spread from Ghia, however, begs the question: Wouldn’t that be kind of fun? Folks, make way for the latest in adaptogenic-boosted DTC pantry items, Ghia’s Happy Ending Ghianduja:
Over the past decade, the global market for adaptogens — which are herbs, mushrooms, and plants that purportedly reduce stress or enhance libido, many of which can be traced back to some form of ayurvedic or non-Western holistic medicinal practice — has been steadily increasing, with purportedly mood-enhancing ingredients such as ashwagandha and maca now found in everything from ice cream to hot cocoa mix. While beverage brands Recess and Kin Euphorics were ahead of the curve when they launched in 2017, the market has been exploding ever since with CBD beverages, (non-psychedelic) mushroom chocolates, and more. As Eater’s Alicia Kennedy writes, “[The turn to adaptogens is] the love child of the anxiety economy and the wellness industry.”
This all brings us to Ghia’s new hazelnut spread. Let’s break down the marquee ingredients: Made in collaboration with the functional mushrooms brand Alice, the spread’s formula includes ashwagandha, a shrub traditionally used in India to reduce stress and increase libido, as well as fellow purported sexy-feeling-boosters Horny Goat Weed, Velvet Bean, maca, and cordyceps. The sumptuous spread also includes a touch of cinnamon and cayenne pepper (another potential aphrodisiac).
Ghia made a name for itself through its flagship product, an herbal, amaro-esque N/A aperitivo, so it’s only fitting that it should dip its hazelnut spread — which has been in its arsenal for years — into vibey adaptogenic waters. I’m already a fan of the non-horny Ghianduja, by the way, the moniker of which appears to play on the word “Gianduja,” the Italian name for a chocolate confection made with hazelnut butter. Ghia’s Ghianduja is dairy-free and — unlike Nutella — is made without palm oil. I found that while it’s a little thinner than some other nut spreads, it’s far more chocolaty than Nutella and includes little chunks of hazelnut that deliver a satisfying crunch.
Whether or not Ghia’s horny Ghianduja will indeed deliver on its happy-ending namesake stands to be seen. When something like this lands in my inbox, a hologram of Gwyneth Paltrow enters my imagination, reminding me that “life is about the blend of cigarettes and tofu” (read: Viagra and ashwagandha). I am careful to never prescribe one over the other, nor to lord a holier-than-thou attitude if I feel like the ashwagandha is, actually, working; for what it’s worth, I have been putting Moon Juice’s maca-boosted Sex Dust in my morning coffee for years, and I feel like it has made me significantly more relaxed and, therefore, open to more horny moments (but that’s just my anecdotal experience).
The timing of this launch (V-Day = imminent) is, of course, on the nose, but Ghia will also be donating 100 percent of the profits from its sales to families impacted by the LA wildfires — and, frankly, that’s reason enough for the skeptical snacker to give it a go. Plus, it’s chocolate and hazelnut — a match made in heaven, with or without the adaptogenic extras.
Learn more about Ghia’s Happy Ending Ghianduja spread here.